I haven’t felt this alive for many months now. These days, I
oscillate between boredom and excitement, restlessness and peace, crowd and
loneliness, anger and joy, every hour. I haven’t had a dreamless night in the
last 10 days and I am unlikely to have one before 28th Sept night
when the train to Jammu lulls me to sleep. I have been trying to keep myself
busy with various preparations and meeting friends.
All the clichés on friendship any person has ever coined can
do meagre justice to just how much love and gratefulness I feel for my friends
these last few weeks. Some have questioned every assumption of mine, some have
shown confidence in me, some have held up a mirror in front of me, some have
planned my trip in more detail than I have, some have simply looked at me with
pride and some, with wide-eyed wonder. A key part of my preparations has been to
meet them so much that maybe I get tired of them and miss them a little less
when I sit by the Beas alone on a chilly evening. Yeah, right! Like that's ever going to happen.
I have been thinking
of stories at every waking hour. Their structures, genres, languages, symbols,
motivations, lengths, depths, characters, tempo, etc. I spend a lot of time
just staring at people and thinking of possible stories. I have completely
stopped reading as I have noticed in the past I get hugely influenced by
whatever it is I may have read last. I have stopped writing because, well, I
have a lot of that to do in the next 6 months and I might as well time my
writer’s bloc perfectly – i.e. April 2013.
And then there are piles and piles of stuff to be bought.
Kinetic chargers, foldable bottles, ipad keyboards, number locks, swiss knives,
thermal-wear and the list can go on forever. Even in this, friends with much
more experience have come forward and made it a walk in the park. I am pretty
confident right now that in a remote village in Baramulla, if there is no
electricity and no vegetarian food, I will still have a decent story written
and a tummy well-fed.
Just so you know how awesome my friends are, there is a
promotion plan in place for the book which has not even been written yet. There
is a build-up route-map which will run in conjunction with my travel and I am
pretty confident it will impress the hell out of any marketing guru. I have talked
to my college profs, ex-bosses and guides, mainly to hear them approve of my
decision and hence draw confidence from their words. I leave on the 27th
with both – a lot of confidence and a lot of pressure and I guess I can only
grow from this experience.
And then, just as i thought I was so ready I could have left
immediately, Anurag Basu gave me a song on Friday that I will carry with me
through the next 6 months. Very few travel songs can give you goose-bumps and
move you to tears. After all, they are supposed to be just about travel, right?
But Papon’s “Kyon” is
a thing of sheer beauty. So visually stunning, so lyrically rich, so hauntingly
melodious is the song that I just know that when I am staring at the Himalayas
in Arunachal, this song is more likely to make me shiver than the sub-zero
temperatures. I have proof. It managed to moisten my eyes before Bombay’s torrential
rains could, last night!
And so I leave on Thursday the 26th of Sept, with
a bagful of confidence, anticipation and hope in the search of beauty and
passion and magic and love.
P.S. – I haven’t had a bigger screen crush than Ileana D’Cruz
in Barfi since Aishawarya
Rai in Kajra Re. Its the eyes. It always is!